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For happyteatime: fanfic review

Saturday, March 5, 2011 @ 3:36 AM

Title: A thing called LOVE

Author: happyteatime

Story URL: http://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/18670/a-thing-called-love-jonghyun-korean-romance-shinee-taemin

Reviewer: ilubshinee

Title:- 3/5- I find your title really cute and well connected to your story... When I first read it I felt like what the story would be... I already heard titles like these before like... “A little thing called love” etc. I think it’s quite common to use it as a title... You should think of a title which is interesting so that readers would find it and click on it... But anyway... I liked it.. ^^

Poster/Background:- 9/10- I’m not being biased or something but the poster is really pretty... The girl’s picture is really connected to what your story is portraying (it’s like she’s really thinking what love is or somewhat confused)... The poster shows a happy feeling when you looked at it... And it’s really cute. It would definitely catch reader's eyes which is good for your fic..

Description, Foreword and plot:- 7/10 – I was impressed by your description...It is well written and you really described what your fanfic will be like. I never heard of this before that’s why it’s interesting to read... The foreword is really nice too you made us readers think of the characters and what roles they will portray.

Creativity/Uniqueness:- 16/20- The story line is really good and your humor is hilarious... You could really make your readers laugh with your story which is really nice. Although the story is kinda like the Anime 'Maid Sama'... You still manage to not copy the exact story of the anime... And the roof top thing? It’s really common in the stories or the dramas that the setting is always on the school’s roof top...I always wonder why?

Flow and Chapters:- 6/10- Since you currently have 4 chapters... I don’t know how will the story will end It’s really a mystery which is good so that the readers will be clueless. But at the meantime the story’s flow is really good the sequence of the story is connected with each other.

Spelling/Grammar/Vocabulary:- 15/20- There are some grammatical errors I found in your story... For example “I really am in a good day...” Which is supposed to be “in a good mood” not good day...? (You could find this in chapter 2) and also the usage of your past tenses... Always think the usage of the past tense. ^^... But your English is good but needs in improvement when in comes to your grammars... This is important.. Readers would get confused if you have wrong grammars.

Characterisation:- 7/10- The characters were well portrayed... The main character which is Hee Yeon... Her attitude really suits her... Jonghyun’s attitude is really like his attitude as a SHINee member since you portrayed him really well... You could imagine Jonghyun while reading the story. But Taemin... I can’t really imagine him in this story...

Writing Style:- 8/10- Your writing style is awesome... You won’t get bored by reading your story the fonts were big enough so that everyone could read it clearly... And you really write clean which is really good.

Excitement and Extras and also Bonus Category:- 3/5- I don’t feel much excitement while reading your story... While reading it... I’m having a feeling that what’s going to happen next...

You talk less to your readers... But you explained to them some things that maybe is confusing for them... But you must talk to your readers too for you to catch their support and love to your fic.

Overall = 74/100

70-79 - Keep up the good work. ^^

Reviewer’s Comment:

First of all... I really want to thank you for choosing me as your reviewer! :) ... Since your story is short and had short chapters... I immediately finished reviewing it. Your story is really good it makes me want to repeat it all the time. ^^... Then I just realized you haven’t been updating for a long time already? I think you should update more often so that your subscribers would increase... It would be nice if you keep on updating your stories because your subscribers are waiting for your updates. ^^

About the story: Your story is really and funny... I love reading it especially the Dora part thing. LOL... I always do encounter Dora every morning. Haha. Jonghyun and Hee Yeon is going to be a cute couple... But Taemin and Hee Yeong looks siblings here. I wonder what you will do in order to avoid that. :)

Well that’s all. Thanks again! :3 Good Luck on your fic!.

-ilubshinee ^^
hoy,hoy!~ <3

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